Fear and Grief...Rearing Their Ugly Head...

Vanuatu is a series of about 80 islands in the South Pacific. There are several missionary families that work on various islands. I have had the privilege to meet many of these missionaries. They are hard working and loving people. All the missionaries are close, calling one another " aunt" and "uncle" they are family to one another. It is a comfort for me to know that my grandchildren have other "family" that cares for them.

This weekend one of the missionary children fell out of a tree while playing with friends and he was severely hurt. He was not able to get the care in Port Vila that was necessary, and it was impossible to get him out on a medical plane. It ended up that he was flown to Australia with his mother on a commercial flight, but it took time.

I can't put into words how moved I have been over this. I cried off and on, and prayed continuously all weekend. Thank the Lord, the little guy( he is only 8) after surgery, is going to be okay, but it will take many months of healing.

I'm sure that some of my response was from the Holy Spirit and His prompting to pray, but this situation reminded me again of the reality of the limitations of where my children live, and this reality again hit home and upset me. They have hospital care, and I am thankful for that. I cannot forget that they did surgery on my son and he got better. I cannot forget that they cared for Joel's bone infection and he got better, but they simply do not always have the means or the doctors to care for something serious.
I was reminded again that it is not a simple thing to get out of the country. It can take days to get a plane that is going where you need to go.

I find that I can go long periods of time and be fine, but then a situation like this or a holiday, or a birthday will remind me of the reality and hardship of my missionaries lives, and I find myself grieved all over again, and it hurts and I'm afraid.

I had to stop, regroup and spend some time in prayer and the scriptures.

"Don't be afraid," he said "Take courage I am here!" Matthew 14:27 NLT.
Yes, Lord, help me to remember this truth... You are there....Help me to remember that if You allow then You will provide a way....Help me to remember that if it is Your will to take one of us home
You will give those of us who remain the grace to cope....
Help me to refocus and put my eyes on eternity....

I was reminded again of the privilege and obligation I have to pray. I cannot protect them from every threat, but I can entrust them to the God who created them and loves them more than I do...
Help me to remember Lord...to pray...to not be lax....to trust You...Help me with my unbelief.

So as I write this I'm calm again...
I'm thankful again....
I'm trusting again....
I've chosen again to give my child, his wife and my grandchildren over to a loving God....